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UKbride Member Request 29 Jan 2020

Dress Shopping

I wonder if I could pick some brains, please? I'm getting married next August (can't wait) but really dreading the whole wedding dress shopping experience. My mum passed away 13 years ago and after doing it all with my daughter for her wedding, it feels like it would be a bit of a let down. My Aunties have said they'd he honoured to come with me as have my sisters in law and daughter so it's not like I have to do it on my own. I have seen a dress online that I quite like and thinking of just getting that. Has anyone else been here and what did/ would you do?

43 Comments
UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I would say you need to try dresses on as I had a completely different idea in my head to what I actually liked and suited me when I tried dresses on. It can be a very stressful but enjoyable experience just go with a open mind and am sure you will find the perfect dress and enjoy the experience in the end xox

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I’m in a similar situation, getting married next March. In terms of wedding dress shopping I just took my maid of honour/best friend as I knew I could trust her opinion and she’d be a great support if I had a little wobble. You don’t want lots of people there as its too many opinions. What I’ve found has helped is having little tributes to your mum, so I’m having a little locket with her picture with in as part of my bouquet and I’m having her favourite flowers also. Just do whats right for you.

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

Babes I did exactly that! I had a smaller wedding and didn't want to fuss with all the trying on, I knew the traditional white dress wasn't for me OR my budget..... I got a dress online from ASOS and loved it. Get a few try on in the comfort of your own home with a nice drink, have fun with it.

You deserve an experience you want and one that makes you happy. Do it your way.

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I took my 2 best friends with me. They were brutally honest just like my mom would have been. Dont buy online u need to try the dresses on. I am having a heart sewn into my dress as a tribute to my mom. Have fun and enjoy the experience xx

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I was very nervous as I don’t like fuss and having lost my mum 18 years ago felt that sadness that she wouldn’t be there... I went with my bridesmaids and had a lovely time! Try to remember this is your special day and you deserve to feel special.... xx

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

i lost my mum 4 years ago and i get married this may . i also was dreading the wedding dress shopping without having my mum there . but i took my sister and 2 of my bridesmaids and my daughters and also my mums best friend came too which made it extra special 🥰

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I went through this as well and i ended up going with my bridesmaids and step mum and i had an amazing day. Every bride deserves to feel like a princess trying on all the gowns. I am glad i went as well as i had seen one on line i like but when i tried the style on in a shop it looked awful. I found the perfect style in shop and then bought one on line. Its your day you got to do what makes u happy. I am glad i did it and surprised my self at how much i enjoyed it. Even though my mum could not be with me i know she would of wanted me to have that experience. Xx

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

Ask yourself what your mom would want you to do cuz i bet she would want you to go to shop with your daughter and aunties and try and dresses and buy one that way. Yes you will miss her but im sure she will be looking down watching you with family

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I losty mum at 15 and dreaded my wedding day. My dad remarried so i ended up going shopping with my step mother and step sister. I hated every minute just didn't feel right, went home and sobbed. Few wks later i went out with my sis in law and stumbled across a lovely outfit when i wasn't even looking. It felt so right, no pressure. I hope you find what your looking and only you can decide what feels right ❤

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I would try the dresses on as sometimes what u think u want doesn't always look right. Also take your Aunties and daughter but remember your Mum is with u anyway. A little piece of your Mum goes on in you and in your daughter. So when you look in the mirror she's smiling back at you . Good luck xx

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I have the opposite all of my family and bridesmaids have very strong opinions so went on my own to try a few on and when I found the one brigade came to see it and all loved it so I bought it. Xx

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

For various reasons my Mum couldn't come with me. It took a while to find the dress, so I went several times, with my aunt and several friends and it was more special as different people shared the fun!

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I was too nervous to go into a bridal shop being plus size, so I’ve ordered my dress online. Just go with your heart 🥰

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

My mum died nearly 4 years ago and my dad 1.5 years ago. I went with my sister for round 1 in The Netherland where I'm originally from, and round 2 in Northern Ireland with my mother-in-law to be, which is where my fiancé is from and where the wedding will be

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

My mam isn’t speaking to my and took my bridesmaids and my future mother in law , and it was the perfect experience:) I get married in August next year and couldn’t wait any longer to try them on :) buying online may be good but it’s part of the fun trying them on , the style I had in mind didn’t suit me and I went for something completely different :) xx

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I dont have contact with my mum, so my MOH came with me, I was absolutely dreading it because I didnt know what I actually wanted..the whole experience was amazing, my MOH was brilliant as were the assistants...I came out smiling from ear to ear 😊

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I hated dress shopping because I’m not the most confident in knowing what suits me.
I lost my mum 5 years ago. I took my 3 adult bridesmaids and my MIL. It was a lovely day and great to include my partners mum.

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I lost my mum 18 months before I went dress shopping and I took my nan (mums mum) and my MOH. It was emotional and I had a good cry before I went but I am so glad I did as what I thought would look good didn't. I wore my mum's wedding ring she left me so she was with me too. But ultimately do what feels right x

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I lost my mum several years ago and have recently been dress shopping. Yes you will notice her presence not being there but if you take along people you love you will still really enjoy the experience. It would be shame to miss out on the fun of trying on dresses, I’m sure your mum wouldn’t want that x

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I didn’t go shopping. I looked online found one I liked and bought it

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I had a shop closing come to me and show me a few options. Went for one I knew from the start I'd go for as it was a style I'd always wanted. I didn't want anyone to see it really and have an opinion 🙄 you could order offline and do a take out and bubbles evening if you want people there to look and help xz

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I lost my mum 6 years ago i took my dad and my sisters my dad cried when i tried on the first dress (i didnt try on anymore) x

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

Do whatever feels right for you xx 💕 I lost my mum 20 years ago, I did go dress shopping with my 2 bridesmaids we went to 1 place and the girl who looked after us was amazing no pressure & it all just felt right. I had my mums veil & had a clutch bag made from my mums wedding dress too. You’ll be ok, you’ll know what’s right for you & don’t feel like you have to follow traditions. Maybe order a few dresses on line & have the girls round and show them at home that way it’s maybe more relaxed xxxxxx 🥰

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

do what is right for you my mum lived far away when i got married as did my friends as i moved i just went shopping on my own the dress shop people were lovely.. and 24 years on i still have it

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I didn't have any family at my dress fitting . I took a very good friend and we had a great afternoon. I got sorted on trying my 2nd dress and the bridal assistant was wonderful and very helpful .

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

Do what you need to do to be comfortable. My mum passed away 4 years ago and i took my auntie, sister, future mother in law and future sister in law with me. When i went Bride 2 be asked who everyone was then marked down on my card no mother of the bride. When i got upset they were very understanding and looked after us well. It the first thing i did in wedding planning as i was dreading it. But if you like the online dress, go for it. You just need to look after yourself.

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I would take the picture of the dress you found and bring it with you when you go dress shopping. They might have it in store. I heard that sometimes when people order their dress online, it's not exactly as shown so better safe then sorry.

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

Dont just get the dress online. I dont know anyone who has tried on their dream dress from the internet and it's been the one when it's on. You deserve the full experience. It will be hard but your daughter and aunties will be there for you x

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I'm estranged from my mum so not quite the same but I had my sister, mother in law and 2 best friends there and honestly they made the day special, we went out for a little celebrate lunch and cocktails after xx

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I done my whole wedding without my mum (different circumstances) I really wasn't looking forward to the dress shopping because it was always something we spoke about, I took with me my bridal party which made things so much easier, see if you can get something or your mums to have with you when you go and on your wedding day,
Keep your chin up ❤️ wishing you lots of luck xx

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I couldn't be arsed with going to a wedding boutique so I bought dresses for myself and bridesmaids at Lindy Bop online. I spent £80 and we all felt really special on the day. 😁

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

Firstly, start looking now, August isn't far away!
Secondly, take someone(s) special, and just choose what's right for you

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I didn't want to go dress shopping, albeit for different reasons to you, and I was going to buy my dress online. However I decided simply to go in to a boutique, just to make sure the style dress I wanted was the right one for me. I'm pleased I did, as the dress I ended up with was completely different to the one I was looking at online, as when I tried on one similar to what I looked at online, it just didn't flatter my figure at all!

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I went dress shopping just to see what styles I liked and suited. Once I had an idea I then got my dress online and it was amazing! Was so much less hassle and it arrived in tonnes of time so I could alter if needed but it wasn't necessary. The dress was literally made for me to my measurements. Good luck and congratulations x

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I got married last August, for the 2nd time. Didn't have my mum as she'd passed away 8 yrs previously. I was a bit apprehensive on my first trip to a bridal shop, but having both my daughters with me, made the experience relaxing and fun. A tip from my youngest daughter..."Keep an open mind and try everthing on" I'm glad I did, because THE dress I ended up with, wasn't what I'd had in mind when I started! Have fun!

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I lost my mum 8 years ago this coming summer. I’m going dress looking next week with my sisters, excited but I know it will be emotional.

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I can't speak from experience but my view for what it's worth is.....
Don't just order the dress online to save the experience of shopping. If you love it and want to try it on that's a different matter but your wedding dress is the most amazing dress you will wear in your entire life so don't settle.

The experience of shopping without your mum will be tough. But so is everyday living without her, as will your wedding day be. You shouldn't not go incase you are emotional. Think about what she would say and what she would want you to do.
Go with people you love and who support you as you have mentioned your daughter and enjoy that special experience with her.
It will be emotional I am sure but hopefully the dress trying will be a distraction.

Don't regret settling for a dress you don't love. X

Good luck. I hope you find your dream dress 👰 and enjoy every second wearing it on your wedding day. X

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I took a couple of good honest friends who desperately wanted to come with me. I didn’t take my mum but my daughter came to my dress fittings. Wish I’d tried a few more on after I had found the one as it was such good fun trying the dresses on and of course drinking fizz! Good luck! 🍾🥂😘

UKbride Member 30 Jan 2020

I lost my mum 13 yrs ago was emotional but I went shopping with my bridesmaids and mother in law and I enjoyed it and found my dress. I get married in May this year. Try some dress shopping will be fun you never know you mind find a dress you love. Good luck and best wishes xxx

UKbride Member 31 Jan 2020

To be honest I have social anxiety and did buy mine online. I just couldn't face the thought of going and trying actual dresses on and talking to people who I didn't know. If it doesn't fit you can always get it altered. Do you what you feel is best. It's for your day x

UKbride Member 31 Jan 2020

Didn't go dress shopping. Bought my dress online!

UKbride Member 1 Feb 2020

I'm an older bride I went shopping with my daughter and had a lovely day 2 of us. She was so happy to have been involved at helping choice my dress with me. Xx

UKbride Member 2 Feb 2020

I had a locket made for my bouquet with picture of my nan and dad in so they will be with me walking down the Isle. I list my dad in 1991. But he always with me x

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