UKbride Member Request 9 May 2019

This is an update from previous post

Can this please be posted to Facebook This is the same poster as the comment regarding family dropping out of wedding due to 15 yr old not being asked to be bridesmaid it’s just more info. Hello brides, I thank everyone for their comments. In understand I could have made my post clearer as a lot of people have made assumptions she was the only cousin left out. This was actually my post. I just wanted to clear a few things up. There are another 3 cousins not included in the wedding not just the 15year old. Also h2b Sister is not a bridesmaid and none of my close friends are bridesmaids. I feel bad she’s so upset, but I told her parents ahead of the dinner. I live down south and all my family live in Up north. We planned a huge dinner in My hometown with all of my family to celebrate our engagement. I had told family members that I was doing my bridesmaid proposals etc. The only ones I didn’t tell that to were the people I was asking and I asked everyone else not to tell them I was doing that. My aunt and uncle knew I was only including their youngest daughter of three. I made sure they knew this and were okay with this before the dinner. They didn’t think anything of it until the 15 year old got upset and wanted to leave. As much as I feel terrible, she’s not the only one not involved and to be honest I was shocked she was upset as she’s at that age where she’s buried in her phone and we don’t have much of a connection apart from being family. I was so upset to hear she was hurt as that’s the last thing I want is to upset anyone. What I don’t appreciate is the fact I’m now the bad guy, all I’ve done is plan my wedding and wanted to celebrate with my family. I understand she’s hurt but I can’t do anything to solve it? What can I possibly do? I can’t include people to spare their feelings, each bridemaid and groomsman is costing £500 each as we are paying for dresses, suits, shoes hair and makeup, bouquets, buttonholes and a room for each of them in the hotel the night before the wedding, adding on another person would cost us an extra 1k as we would need to add another groomsman on my h2bs side. 1k is a lot of money just to please someone. I spoke to her parents after it and said I was sorry she felt that was but was hurt they couldn’t be happy for me especially since I didn’t do anything malicious. I didn’t expect to be removed from Facebook and have the 15year old tell people she’s not going and she doesn’t care. I never done anything to hurt anyone and I made sure I spoke to the parents before all of this. They still decided to bring her along and not tell her about the bridesmaid proposals which I understand they are probably surprised she’s upset since she’s not the only one left out but feeding into it and verifying her feelings of being left out made it worse. She should have been consoled and explained how weddings work instead of blaming me when I done everything I could to make everyone aware of my intentions. I’m hurt, I’m stressed and I’m distraught that my uncles wife and daughter don’t want to attend and as a result my uncle and the rest of his family won’t be attending. An entire side of my family have turned their back on me because I didn’t include one their daughters. It hurts.



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