Morning everyone - so last night I met a friend for coffee, I have known and have been good friends with her for around 11 years. She dropped the bombshell that she and around 6 of our other friends had actually planned to go away the weekend of our wedding (they have known for months the date) so none of them will be attending. We have lots of other friends so its not like there will be a huge gap of people, however, I feel very let down and incredibly upset. So after a very tearful night and not much sleep I have decided that I really do not want to spend any more time on people who make me feel like that. The end of an era but onwards and upwards :)
CommentAuthorElizabethF49
Aww hun that's just horrible. Why would real friends act like that, its not like they don't know when the big day is. If it was me id ask them why they booked that weekend knowing when the wedding was. Id then tell them where to go and get on with life without them.
Hugs to you though as its horrible being in that position xx
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CommentAuthorTheNewMrsBarrett
Oh hon that's awful of them! So sorry you've had a sleepless night over them, tho I think you're right: don't waste any more time on people who treat you like that! Tho I'd probably be like Elizabeth and want to know why they did it and then take great pleasure in telling em where to go!
Sending you hugs too hon xx
CommentAuthorTashaM16
Ditch 'em. If you allow someone to get away with this kinda thing once they will continue to do so. I've been having to have a serious think about which of my friends to invite as well so know the feeling. They sound like really rubbish friends.
CommentAuthorclairenina
You don't need them, surround yourself with people that don't suck the life out of you like that. Onwards and upwards, you deserve better x
thanks everyone - they are officially ditched :/ sad, but I simply cannot accept they think our wedding is an unimportant event - I'm not planning on doing it again!
CommentAuthorElinor Claire
That's a shame. I would take great delight in letting them know what a wonderful day they missed. I had one or two who didn't bother to ask for time off work, but they weren't such close friends.
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CommentAuthorKayleighS46
that is really awful of them! i know i'd feel exactly the same as you - some of my so called 'friends' have decided they might be away that weekend - eventhough you can now only just book holidays for 2016 and my weddings been booked for 6 months now. it just shows whose your true friends
good luck to you hun you dont need them in your life xx
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CommentAuthorMidgetGem89
Maybe thats the only time they can actually get away? I wpuldnt tske i as theyve done it deliberatly theres worse things they can so than tell you they may not be coming... in the long run theyve told u and didnt just string u along thinking theyd be there and be no shows(trust me this is much worse!)
If u feel u cnt be friends with them because of that them thats fair enuff, but if i was your friend if that was your reaction to my personal plans id let u take your huff and get on with my plans lol
My bm said she was undecided wether to book holiday weekend of my wedding or not and i had told her to do it. Shes since decided not to as she is now saving for her own wedding but it didnt bother me 1 bit.
Also maybe they forgot the wedding and remembered the date but couldnt match it to an event so they picked that date when planning??
Got to look at all options on this... but just remember the peiple who REALLY care wil be there. But i wouldnt take it so personally.. let it blow over your head and just say ok x
CommentAuthorAprilS61
It's a shame how inconsiderate people can be, especially those who you've known and been close to for so long.i guess there's nothing you can do about it but just shrug it off and don't make so much effort with them in future. You can still be friends, but personally, I think things like this cause a distance between friendships. I think we've all had experiences.
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CommentAuthorInDreamland
Hmmm, if they all knew the date and then all decided that they were going to go away I think that's a bit out of order to I'd question whether they're really proper friends. Hope you can move on xx
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CommentAuthorSprucey
Hmm bit strange they all decided to do it, I think there must've been a bit of if one decides it a good idea they all agree, I wonder if one decided they definitely couldn't miss your wedding whether the others would follow. Is that date really the only date they can all do something together? Seems odd. I would forget all about them tbh and concentrate on your day x
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CommentAuthorSammi_with_camera
Wow, no wonder you were upset. Poor you, not the nicest people in my opinion so maybe you are best off saving the £'s on a sit down meal they clearly don's deserve. Maybe one of them got jealous and persuaded the others to make plans to go away? Just a thought? x
CommentAuthorTeresaC54
they always go away for weekends together 3 or 4 times a year -- its a Pirate festival they're going to - I think it is mainly one person which is fine. I am not going to lose any more sleep over it, It just means that people I couldn't invite to the day before because of numbers I now can! :)
CommentAuthorMidgetGem89
Exactly just think of it that way they r making space for others to go who by sounds of it r the better option :-)
CommentAuthorMinkyM
Thats really awful and I wouldn't waste any time thinking about them. So out of all 52 weekends they can only go away the weekend of your wedding? Absolutely joke I book my holidays round weddings, twice I have come back early so I can attend friends weddings - because they are FRIENDS
CommentAuthorCamilaL
That's terrible! I usually think that I shouldn't care about people who don't care about me. So, just keep this in mind, whoever did this is not worth x
CommentAuthor*KelBel*
edited
I would think whether they were real friends, especially as ppl can go away any weekend, bit strange that they knew the date of the wedding but all chose to go away then ?? I'd be very upset by this and think definitely spend the time on the friends making an effort,x
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CommentAuthorHazelM69
Aww I can't even begin to imagine how you are feeling I would be devastated also, it spends how much they mean to you on how you play it. Sending you hugs xx
CommentAuthorIrishbride2be
im a very upfront person and if someones in the wrong i will just say it (except when its my future SIL can't be assed with the hassle ha) but if it was my friends i would be throwing it right out there how out of order they are being! xx
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CommentAuthorNaomiC8
i see that as a complete disrespect, especially if they call themselves friends... I'm sure they could have had a girly holiday at another date, even the following weekend..
But what you've said is completely the way you should be, if people are not willing to make the effort that you would make for them, then dont waste your time.
Its important that you have those that are genuine and care enough to not be so unreasonable.