We have quite a small venue for our wedding and can only have 55 people at the day (including us!) meaning that alot of people will only be invited to the evening reception.
Some people have assumed that they will be getting an invite to the whole day but I know they won't be! I would quite like to put a litle note in with their invites explaining why they are only invited to the night and that it's not because they are less important to us - I was thinking of a poem or somethign but can't find anything online - can anyone on here help!?
Or has anyone had the saem issue - what did you do?
Z x
CommentAuthorbridalmiss
We just did this, invited all to the ceremony but only some for the main reception, others to the evening - no-one's come back and asked why they're not on the day list yet, I'm sure plenty of ppl will understand :-)
Dear [blank line/space to write names in] you are warmly invited to attend the wedding of GROOM and BRIDE on Sunday 3rd June 2012, 2pm at CHURCH and afterwards for an evening reception party at VENUE from 7.30pm
RSVP by 31st March 2012 We look forward to seeing you there!
CommentAuthorrocketqueen
I felt the same but didn't know how to word it. So, on evening evening invites we put...
We'd love you to join us for food, drink, dancing and celebration to mark our marriage.
Nobody has been funny so far and anyone we've spoke to has been told that we wish we could afford to bring them all. We have 40 in the day.
Here comes the bride......
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
You dont need to explain your self hunni ....we too can only have 50 to the day event
Thanks for the ideas It's not really that I want to explain myself, it's that I don't want anyone to be offended that they're not invited to the day. My real concern is some people at my work. We're inviting one couple from my work (I work with the girl and H2B is friends with the boy) to the day but the other 2 people I work closest with will only be getting evening invites - but they have both assumed they will be coming all day - maybe I should have put them right at the start?! To late for that now and I'm panicing as our invites will be going out at the end of this month.
hahaha I agree! Maybe I should just stop worrying - just I know that they'll discuss it between themselves when I'm not around Suppose if they're going to be funny about it then we'd be better off without them there!
Z x
CommentAuthorKaz
We've got a few that are assuming that if they offer help they'll be invited!!!
WARNING:
I say the first thing I think of!
CommentAuthornatalie2614
we have a few that have assumed they will be there all day. they will be getting a shock when they receive an evening invite. We're only having family and very close friends there during the day. And to be honest, we get married at 4 so theyre not missing much!
Married my best friend 05.04.2013
CommentAuthorZoe81
Glad I'm not the only one with this problem - I'll just man up and stop worrying about it - if they are real friends they won't be offended and will want to come anyway
Z x
CommentAuthorMrsSaraParry!
we were the same, we're only having 40 to the day including us and 65 in the evening. I made it quite clear from day 1 that no-one from work would be invited all day and that only a few could be invited in the evening due to space. I had the difficult job of telling my 1/2 sister and her family that they were only invited in the evening - she tried to give me the guilt trip about her being my sister but the simple truth is we haven't got space for all 4 of them, and I wasn't prepared to bump down my close friends who I see regularly to accommodate 4 people I hadn't seen in 2 years and am only really inviting because I have to! Don't worry about it anyway hun, they'll either understand or they wont, and if they don't they're not worth worrying about :o) xxx
CommentAuthorgdu
I was wondering what the best way of doing it - we have culled the guest list from 120 to 40 as I just didn't want all the fuss but we are planning an early evening do starting at 5 or 6. All H2bs family have big weddings so it will be a massive shock to some of them that they aren't invited to the full day so if there is a way of putting it nicely it might soften the blow!
None of it is booked yet so it could change yet again!
CommentAuthorMrsSaraParry!
haha, we've just gone for the different invites option! One set says 'Wedding Invitation' on the front and the other says 'Evening Invitation' - I'm sure people will get the message ;o) I'm not going to justify myself to people, as far as I'm concerned they should be flattered that they're invited - a wedding is such an important event, its nice just to be invited at all.
CommentAuthorMrsRichardson2B
On the wedding invites and not wanting to offend subject, does anyone know the correct protocol on who we should send save the dates to? Just day guests or everyone? We want to avoid people assuming they are invited to the whole thing too :)
CommentAuthorladyannwyn
you could make a point of writing a nice poem for those in the evening so it seems really special even though its only the evening and make the day guests have a formal invite as it has more information in it.
off the top of my head .....
put on your suits and dresses as we celebrate becoming Mr and Mrs! at (time) we start our new life as a proud couple, husband and wife!
so make your way to ...... for a song, and we will celebrate all night long! food and laughs will be shared and enjoyed, Replying by (date) would make us overjoyed!
not bad for around 20 mins of thinking, although my head does hurt a bit!!!! lol what do you think? xx
CommentAuthorMrs Stocks 2B
CommentAuthorZoe81
Wow ladyannwyn that's amazing for 20 mins work!
Unfortunately H2B is turning out to be more traditional than I expected and wants quite formal invites, so no poems :(
Hopefully everyone will just be happy to be invited to any of the day, it's costing us a fortune to have them to any of it!
The invites will say wedding invitation or evening invitation on the front - the problem was offending people who think they will be getting a wedding invite when they will actually only be getting an evening invite - I'm manning up and will just deal with people's reactions as they get their invites!
Z x
CommentAuthorLegoWife
I don't think there's anything you could put in the wording of the evening invites that'll take away from the "surprise" they've not been invited to the day. Maybe you could put something like- "Due to number limitations we'd be delighted if you could celebrate our day with us at our evening reception." If you're going to use the numbers excuse. I think saying 'number limitations' can easily double up as a "sorry we couldn't afford to pay for you." without actually saying that lol.
~Wedding made of Lego~
*Married 30/03/13*
CommentAuthorMrs Cerutti2b
We work together, and we've had all of them assuming they are invited to the full day, even if I do keep explaining that its just a small day do, with close friends and family. as when the last couple who worked with us got married (yes my work is like a mini match maker) everyone was invited, but we just can't afford it, there is one person we work with coming, as he's a great friend, as someone we see outside of working hours!
But its annoying when people just assume, so i'm just going to offend them, harsh as it may sound, i've tried hinting, to no luck, so if they get upset by it then its there fault! Good luck with it though, I know its stressful x
CommentAuthorMrsSaraParry!
mrs cerruti we're similar, I work in a small primary school and when one of the other teachers got married she invited everyone and their partners! Of course, everyone expected me to do the same but I've had to say that I can only invite people to the evening, and even then I've only got space for 4 or 5 with their partners. I think lots of people are going to be offended, but I'm past caring :o) xx
CommentAuthorMrs Cerutti2b
I think after a while, you do just have to put other people feelings aside, and try and sort out your big day, if you tired to please everyone, it would cost us all millions!!
CommentAuthorUnknown
i have seen but not sure when or where someone has put that on invites before. it is really bugging me now.
i think it just said something like because of the size of the venue we can not have many people so having a large reception. i cant remember the exact wording but something along those lines
i think it is really rude to assume you will get an invite xx
CommentAuthorladyannwyn
i personally wouldn't b offeneded if someone said 'due to number limitations' at least they are being invited! it sounds nice and polite but explaining why they arn't at the day part, it is your day at the end off it they will be happy to be there :) xxx
CommentAuthorFuture Mrs Doublé
I have exactly the same situation, my venue insisted that no more than 90 people can come to evening which is very little, but the room really isnt big and part of it will be used as dancefloor, so I am not sure how to phrase it either, for the fact that I can't invite partners as well.
Soon to be Mrs Gary Doublé
Everything is now booked
Getting really stressed and excited now
CommentAuthorJill
I think number limitations is the way to go - sounds like you really want them there but it's out of your hands x
29th September 2012
Cant wait to be Mrs D!
CommentAuthorZoe81
Thanks for all the suggestions and I'm glad I'm not the only one! - I might put an extra note in for the people I think may be offended. Something along the lines of "due to number limitations" I'll think about it whilst I'm at work tomorrow, gives me something better to do than actually work!
