Wedding Forum - What's gone wrong?...

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The Big Day: What's gone wrong?

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- CommentAuthorRachaelF7
  
  edited
Hey All!

So the wedding's all booked - April 2015, I've found my dress, we have the rings, the photographer and the DJ, We know where we're honeymooning just wating for flights to be released.

So why am I not excited???

My H2B did take a bit of a dominant role at the beginning, and we almost nearly called the whole thig off because he wanted a candy floss machine and I wouldn't let him, but now all the big decisions have been made (and have mostly been his choices) hes taking a back seat role and leaving all the bitty bits to me. I feel like it's not even my wedding.

I can't event motivate myself to do the guest list, let alone send the invites out, source a cake, flowers, bridesmade dresses, presents. Shouldn't this be the best bit? All I find myself doing is getting frustrated at how much things cost and thinking "I could put this towards a deposit on a house!"

Has anyone else had these feelings, how do I overcome them?

CATEGORY CHANGED BY MODERATORS TO REFLECT THE CONTENT OF THE POST BETTER.
THANKS
MODS.

Met on POF Feb 2012
First Date March 2012
Propsed January 2013
Wedding April 2015.....
- CommentAuthorInDreamland
My best advice is for you to have a chat with your h2b. Sounds like you are worried about costs spiralling and that it doesn't feel like the wedding day you're comfortable with.

Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!
- CommentAuthorcasbride87
Talk to him xxx
- CommentAuthorMrsBull2B
Only thing you can do is talk to him, if you dont it might ruin everything x

Met 5th Sept 2005
Got together 10th May 2011
Got Engaged 14th Feb 2012
Getting Married 13th June 2015
- CommentAuthorLauraJo87
I went through something similar at the same stage in my planning - big bits sorted, all the nif naf and trivia to sort.

Really lost my wedding mojo, and felt a bit robbed - everyone seemed to be more excited about the wedding than me, and I was feeling like I would've rather just gone to the registry office, did the deed, and gone for a meal afterwards.

Give yourself a break from the planning. Spend a bit of quality time with your h2b, doing something totally unrelated to the wedding.

To be honest, after the initial excitement of booking the venue,photographer, getting the dress etc up until about three months beforehand, I wasn't feeling very excited.

I did have a wonderful day and couldn't have asked for more, so it all came right in the end.

My Beating Heart Belongs To You
30 August 2013

The First Day Of My Happily Ever After

- CommentAuthorAprilS61
Talk to him but so he knows it's about how you feel, not as if you're moaning (that's what mine would think!) then have a day or two away to unwind :) Weve just been to Blackpool for 2 days. Have a look on group0n and see if anything takes your fancy :) hope you get it sorted :) xx

Mr & Mrs Swan 04/04/15
- CommentAuthorRachaelF7
Thanks guys.. Feeling a little better now. I think I am just worried that everything I want is just out of our price range... I guess I just have to shop around and get some cheaper quotes :)

I think I am going to book us a surprise weekend away some where and remind us why we're doing this!

Thanks Peeps :)

Met on POF Feb 2012
First Date March 2012
Propsed January 2013
Wedding April 2015.....
- CommentAuthorCharlotteE98
  
  edited
I must admit that most of our big stuff is booked now and I feel a bit flat. It's almost as if the novelty has worn off. I haven't had a huge amount of support from my family (poorly Aunt, poorly Gran and poorly dog have, quite understandably, taken up a lot of my Mum's time and my Dad just doesn't seem interested at all) which hasn't helped, and my OH tends to just agree with everything I say!

We also almost called the whole thing off because of arguments over the budget, who was paying for what etc., but we've got through it :o) My OH made a very good point in that it's important to make the most of the planning and enjoy it as much as possible, because the time will fly by and we want to look back with happy memories rather than remembering rows! And he's also convinced me that I don't need to eat, sleep and breathe wedding and I can have a break from it now and again :o)

I don't know if it would help you, but we put together a 'dream wedding' budget spreadsheet. Basically a list of everything we want for our wedding and a rough estimate of how much it will cost. It was quite a shock when we saw the grand total, but it has really helped us with our budgeting :o)

Hope you're feeling a bit happier now.
- CommentAuthorRachaelF7
Hi Charlotte,

Thank you, it is great to know I'm not alone in all this.. But also I am sorry you have had a rough time too.

I've taken a break from all the wedding stuff, just dip in and out now and I feel a lot less stressed. I am just concentrating on my exams and then I am getting all my girls to gether and just have a really good wedding planning sesh. The OH has finally realised he needs to butt out! I love that he's so enthusiastic but it much nicer now I get to make a decision or two myself :)

I think we all need times like this, I love that we have come through all the arguments and tantrums, tears etc and I know hes defo the one, without a shadow of a doubt!

Good times ahead :)

Thanks Everyone :) xxx

Met on POF Feb 2012
First Date March 2012
Propsed January 2013
Wedding April 2015.....